Swinging

I could scarcely believe me doggy ears last week... shocked I was.

I've never heard anything so rude and if I could go red I would have done, even under me fur.

And it all started down the pub.

You see I often take me humans Renee and Richard down the pub for me Saturday lunch... usually to a place in town because they are sensible people and let in good looking well behaved woofers.

We've been a few times now and the lady who runs the place is very friendly... there are dental sticks galore!

She was telling me (me humans were there, too) about this couple they had in at the pub.

They'd had a party (the older couple, that is) but most of their guests had left.  Just as things were wrapping up the fella slipped his arm around the landlady's waist and whispered into her ear, 'So I hope my wife and I will see you and your husband later?'

'Oh no,' says the landlady, 'We'll be working until quite late so we really couldn't come for a drink.'

The man coughed apologetically.

'Perhaps I haven't made myself quite clear.  We're inviting you into our swinger's circle.'

WHAT?

'Errmmm, well, obviously, errr, I'm well flattered, but well, I'm happy... I mean we're happy being a couple... You know.'  The landlady smiled weakly.

The wife must have seen the slightly dazed and shocked look on the landlady's face because she sidled over.  'Oh dear,' she said.  'Did my husband frighten you by being a little too direct?'

Now the landlady was getting annoyed.

'No he didn't frighten me... it's just not the bag we're into, thank you very much,' she said with a touch of asperity.

'Theres no need to be frightened,' continued the wife.  'I was frightened the first time, but it really is very enjoyable...'

'Yes,' piped up a lady's voice from the table.  'It's good fun, you'll really enjoy yourself and it's all very gentle.'

I can't believe this, thought he landlady to herself, looking round for her husband.

And fair play to the guy, he saw trouble was brewing so he was over like a shot: 'I wonder if you'd mind checking in the kitchen... now, who'd like another drink?'

Well, me fur was well and truly ruffled by this...

It's not exactly the swinging that was the problem, although I can't see it meself.  It was the fact the subject was broached and even after saying 'no' there were quite a lot of pressure applied.

Now, there's nothing wrong with asking for the business, as it were, but you have to read the situation, too.  If it's a no-no, let it go.  If its a no-not now, well then there's a different approach to be taken.